Gotta Simplify

When others save it, we call it garbage. When we save it, we call it archives, files, reference materials or just plain old stuff. Yet, each and everyone could use to purge, recycle and repurpose so many of our items. Hoarding has become recognized by psychologists as a legitimate mental illness requiring treatment. Clutter is expensive in terms of time, cost and mental energy.  If you want the world to be a better place, start with making a better place in your world.

Encouraging Each Other

When was the last time someone told you, "You can do this!"  I speculate that it has been a while. It seems to be out of style to give people around us encouragement to do better, reach their goals or know that they are on the right track. In the work place, many managers just assume that you know if you are doing something well. It's easier to look on their dashboards and see where you are short in some measurable metric and have 'coach' you in to doing better. I don't have an easy answer on how to get the appreciation and encouragement which we call would like. My only suggestion is when was the last time your told someone you, "You can do this!"  When it comes to receiving this, be the support which you would like from others.

Success Comes In Baby Steps

It is quite rare that someone truly experiences overnight, lasting success. For most people, success comes to us in baby steps. Much like the actual steps of an infant, our baby steps on the path to our goals are soft ,slow and can be uncertain. We might toddle and fall down in between the series of steps we take. But with time and practice, we are dashing around the living room at full speed. Baby steps are what it takes for the infant to grow into a toddler, and then a child, then a teen, and finally an adult. Baby steps are what we need to grow in our process in the beginning to the middle to the ultimate success that we seek.

Your World Is More Than Just The News Reports

If we believe the news headlines, we would be paralyzed with fear.  News reports are composed of what’s wrong; it takes individual self-discipline to remind ourselves what is right in our world. Look at the headlines.  While we hear a great deal about Ebola, remind yourself that scientists work diligently to cure infectious diseases and doctors take great precautions when they come in contact with this. While we are concerned about the reign of terror from dissident groups such as ISIS, most people are actually peace loving. When we hear about school shootings, assaults and bullying know that the overwhelming majority of students made it to school safe, on time and are learning. In uncertain times, fear can be pervasive. Know that while these incidents are real, the news will never feature the headline: “Decent person does job well, pays bills, gets kids to school, appreciate family and lives life with a measure of self-satisfaction.” It is each of our jobs to remind us ourselves. 

Dealing With Disappointments

It is a fortunate soul who doesn't experience some form of disappointment from time to time. The hope, wish, dream, goal or desire which we wanted didn't happen, for some reason. You or I had looked forward to this with great anticipation and nothing came from it. While we can rehash the details over and over, there is only one way to look at such an experience. You have to catch yourself in mid thought, and reframe the experience. I like the phrase, "Either this ... or something better." Claim that the occurrence which disappointed you is only a stepping stone to a greater good.  When ever your mind wants to make this into a full blown drama, remind yourself  "Either this ... or something better."

Doing Right Things vs. Doing Things Right

Many people have an internal struggle where they know they are doing  right things with their life. They eat nutritious, exercise, show up for work, accomplish their tasks of their job and spend available time with their families and in pursuit of their interests. And, from doing all this, they feel stuck, unhappy, unfulfilled or on a dead end path. Doing things right means changing the energy and attitude with which you do those actions and tasks. While you eat, enjoy the flavor of the foods. When you exercise, feel your body rejuvenate. At work, recapture the enthusiasm that you first had when you started the position. When you are on your time, enjoy the moments doing those things. Take the time to do all the things in your life right and be totally present in those moments.

Cleaning Up The Garbage In Our Minds

Emotions and clutter from the past holds us back from having the success which we also seek. Others hurt us and did us wrong. Our life would be superior if only something better had happened to us. A key to having the life we choose is to clean up our minds and hearts. Work to be present in the moment and to create our future. As we would walk bags of trash to the curb, collect up the past failings, resentments and disappointments and make a list so you can release them. How willing are you to do this? Watch your reactions and resistance. Dare to become free from the weight of all this garbage.

Don't talk yourself up in order to talk others down.

One aspect of social media is you get to sincerely get to see what people think about themselves when they post on their personal pages. One talented and complex woman I know has taken to try to build up her own self esteem by creating a competition against everyone with whom she's connected. She feels as if she's been put down and beat down by so many people around her. And, while she may need to work on her self esteem, this tactic is totally missing the point. No one needs to talk others down if they want feel good about themselves in the long term. And, when you truly feel good about yourself, others will respect you and won't talk you down.

The Magic of Anticipation

The magic of anticipation.  This mere idea of this speaks to our spirit. Having something to which we can look forward is such a powerful motivator. It is why children (as well as parents) have such anticipation about the holiday season. It can also be why others negatively self talk themselves out of their good - Negative anticipation. One aspect of a more fulfilled life is to have goals, events and outcomes which drive us to anticipate their outcome. Start anticipating more good in your life (even when it doesn't look like this will happen) and you'll see that more good occurrences will start to happen.

It takes more than just lemons to make lemonade

We have all heard the tired cliche about what to do when life 'hands us lemons.'  Missing from that wisdom is that we have to use our personal resourcefulness. Lemonade takes sugar to make the fruit far less tart, the action of squeezing to make the fruit juice usable, ice to chill the beverage and some glass or container to hold our output. It takes our knowledge, activity and logistics to make a great glass of lemonade, Next time, you make a something out of life's lemons, look at all the different tools that aided you in making something from the lemons. Give yourself credit for using them too.

Give Yourself A Special Gift This Holiday Season

The holidays season is here. The next several weeks will be filled with hordes of shoppers scouring the malls and stores seeking to find that perfect gift for everyone on their list.  In the midst of all this shopping and wrapping, have you ever thought of the gift you want for yourself. No, I'm not talking about that latest tech gadget or sharp sweater you saw. I'm talking about taking a moment out during all this hustle and bustle to nurture yourself during this time. Make it okay to avoid getting caught up in the frenzy of all this consumerism. One trigger for holiday depression is when people have a picture of how it 'should be,' and it doesn't quite turn out that way.  So, make it okay for this holiday to be less then perfect, but much more peaceful. Resolve to have a sane holiday season.

Who should you tell?

One of the greatest challenges of any goal or desire is with whom should you share it with?  You're brimming with the idea, and you just want to tell people. The easy answer seems like everybody. Perhaps you may need to be more careful.
Ask yourself, who outside of yourself will actually support you with time, energy, interest and even investment?  This may be a short list. Who can you ‘absolutely not tell’ because they ego, opinions, energy and actions will contaminate the idea? This may be a much longer list than the first one. Who will merely pay lip service to the idea? Many. Who should you not tell because they don't understand it or might not even care? More than a few.
When sharing your next great idea, be careful on who you want to share the idea with. Share with those who have  proven they will be supportive and see your good for you.

What Movies Are You Playing In Your Mind?

Your mind thinks in pictures. We may communicate with words, sounds and numbers, but we see visual images when we meditate, daydream, envision or create. The movie reels above represent pictures from the 1970's. Ask yourself, are you watching movies in your mind from that era?  Change the reel to look at pictures from today.  Visualize images that start right now and move in to the future. Look forward towards the future with new pictures of something better.  Hold the vision in your mind, no matter what other distractions interrupt you.

Thinking Beyond Your Thinking

Our thoughts are often trapped by the language we use to describe them.  We would like 'more money.' 'a new car,' 'a better job,' or some goal that seems specific, but we are actually quite vague.  With a new car, is it that we want a model from off the assembly line or just an upgrade to what we own?  When we aspire to a better job, are we looking for one that pays better, uses our talents more productively, or feels more fulfilling?  Catch yourself and make this change. Next time you blurt out how life could be better, think beyond your thinking. Write down the desire you stated, then translate it into what you truly want. If you write down 'a new car,' list all the features of the car which you seek including payment. If you want your career to be different, tell your conscious mind all about the subconscious desires you have for this new position. Think beyond your thinking. Be specific.

Finding Your Best Solutions, Not Just An Answer

We all hear other people with health problems, money challenges, relationship hurdles and issues of all sorts talk on and on about the nature of the issue.  Often, they will talk about making healthier choices, learning money management strategies, changing how they approach relationships and how to better live their lives; but more often than not ... they save that wisdom and insight for when someone else is having those issues. You are your own best consultant, advisor and guru. Take a moment to discreetly write down what your problem or concern is ... and then, trick yourself into giving you 'the solution' as if it was for someone else. You might just be surprised how smart you really are. Then, implement it for yourself. Don't make a big announcement. Just make the change which you want. If you miss the mark, begin again. You know what you need to do, but are you willing to do it? 

Giving Thanks: How About Your Future?

Looking at an infant, we all enjoy speculating about what will their future will be like? A universal desire is that it be better than the present. Let's be grateful that all that unlimited potential is ahead of each child. Let's also feel grateful that they have the ability to do better than the 'better' which we all have achieved. As this infant has eyes wide open, let's believe that the future is a better place and be grateful that the lessons we learn both individually and collectively can be made manifest in it.

Giving Thanks: Be Grateful Right Where You Are

A gardener friend of mine said that flowers, unlike people, never complain. They never feel that other flowers got more sunshine or more water or were put in better soil or in gardens with better plants. Flowers just bloom where they're planted and make the best of their situations.  How about us?  I believe that we would be better off if we use our present circumstances as a starting point and accept them, yet still grow towards the sun.  Are we complaining about the soil or beds in which we are planted?  Accept exactly where you are and give thanks that you have an opportunity to grow from there.

Giving Thanks: Remembering Our Past

In our hectic present moment based world, we often forget that all progress comes from building on the past and solving the issues, problems and dilemmas which those who came before us solved. We often live where we do because someone made a decision to seek gainful opportunity. We know the people we know because of the same. Yet, we also carry inside of us a rich history from those who came before us. In reflecting this week on things for which to be grateful, also include your forefathers and foremothers who made choices. Celebrate those choices both big and small. 

Giving Thanks: Thoughts + Action = Tribute

When someone says that something they have done is in tribute to another, it touches our hears and souls in a very meaningful way. When was the last time you put your thoughts of gratitude into action to produce a tribute to someone? This is a very powerful and lasting statement of what someone meant to you. It's one thing to say the words, but to create something lasting that shows yourself and the world that this person had meaning ... that's a more powerful statement. Is there a real and tangible way you would like to say thank you to another for the lessons they taught you, the presence in your life or just because they are special in your mind and heart? Just enact this simple formula: Thoughts + Action = Tribute.

Giving Thanks: The Power of Gratitude

It's easy to talk about gratitude for a few minutes during Thanksgiving. But the power of gratitude is a life changing mental state. It can be a life changing process where you can feel a change in your mindset. It allows you to create new ideas, thoughts, processes and outcomes. Importantly, gratitude also can change the mindset of those around you to see that the things which they squawk about are not as bad as they once imagined.  Finding gratitude in any situation doesn't mean complacency, but rather you see your present good as a firm foundation on which to build higher achievements.

Peace Wherever We Are

There are some people who are able to keep cool no matter what they do or where they are. I think that these people have super powers. Life happens and they don't react. Instead, they know that this latest event hasn't come to stay. Peace in our world is an inside job. Most events are not good or bad, but thinking makes it so. Let's tap into this super power next time life moves on us.

Reading and writing

Too many of us confuse reading social media posts and writing to-do lists as thinking and creating. Give yourself permission to read more. Give yourself permission to write more. Give yourself permission to think beyond your current state of thoughts.

The Mystery of YOU

Inside of you is an amazing genetic composition that is uniquely yours and totally unlimited. Stop limiting your thoughts, beliefs and ideas. How?  By thinking that you are limited. Take a moment to feel that you have power and potential greater than the labels and ideas you may have spoken say. You have a vast array of talent and abilities in you which no one can deny.

The Difference One Drop Can Make

When we look at the vastness of lakes and oceans, we realize that all this majestic water is actually composed of billions of drops of water coming together in one place at one time, united in the purpose of creating such a body of water. Makes one wonder if we thought of this same vastness as human potential, what could we accomplish by coming together in one place at one time, united in the purpose of creating a common goal.

What The Artist Sees

We are fortunate to live in a world of artists. It is there artistic vision which reminds us to look at our world differently. Artists are masters of interpreting light, shadow and perspective. They must look at a scene for hours or some times days; and then make judgements in a split second that determine what they capture and what we see.  What if we approached our life more as an artist does? What if we looked towards what we want to capture with the same approach of vision, interpretation and then capturing the moment for all to see?

Which Path Do You Choose?

Every decision we make is like standing at a cross roads. Unlike the street signs labeled "Failure" or "Success," we only see the potential choices that we can make. We look at the choices and from there make a determination of whether or not this is failure or success.  Life is about Intelligent Choices. Take risks which you understand and lead you toward expressing and achieving your goals.

How Do You Define Success

The note posted here describes a general definition of success which most people can agree upon. The challenge is that most people don't have an individual definition of success. Many people say feel that "MORE" is a good definition ... but more of what?  Take a moment and a sheet of people and then ask yourself, "What does success mean to me?"  Yes, finer living arrangements and better transportation are fine examples of success. Ask yourself about the individual and specific elements which would fit your definition. 

The desperate things a desperate person will do

A recent reality TV celebrity (who shall remain nameless) made quite a stir with a magazine photo pictorial featuring her in various stages of dress ... and then undress. This isn't surprising, nor is this news. Spend your mental energy thinking about ideas which have a direct impact on your world and the things you care about.  Don't ever get swept up in the desperate things a desperate person will do to promote a desperate career. Looking at it, talking about it, positing on it and thinking about it will not improve your life. It will only distract you, if only momentarily.

Speed Bump

The job of an asphalt speed bump is to slow our vehicle down.  Life also has speed bumps, which aren't made from asphalt. When an event, a person or a circumstance slows you down, look at the scenery around you and see what else is going on.  When life slows you down, ask yourself, "Is this a barrier or merely just a speed bump?"

It's okay to carry the shoes

If you would believe some voices, the most important person in that picture is the family in the water having a great time walking through the sand. Missing is an appreciation that the man is carrying the shoes for them, allowing them to have the experience they want. It's okay to carry the shoes for others and let them have the experiences and joy which they seek.

Words of Encouragement

A simple of word of encouragement to anyone is a gift which they long to hear. Each of us hear so much about our shortfalls and limitations. When you can, tell someone a kind compliment you feel about them.  Both of you will feel better from the exchange.

Write It Down

Everyone has great ideas. One key to putting those ideas in place is to write them down. If you talk them out, other people will influence them.  Whenever inspiration hits you, take a moment to write it down and make sure you write all the information you can about the idea - whatever it is. You could find yourself on the road to the next great success story.

Remember Someone Special

Take a moment right now and think of someone special you have known. Take a moment to recall someone close to you and a time or place when you felt that way. You don't have to do anything more than let those memories fill your head and heart. In the hectic, day to day chase for our goals and dreams, let those memories nurture you for more than just a moment. Remember this moment several times today.

What's Your Plan?

When formulating an idea, everyone has a plan on how to best achieve the outcome. Too many people want their plans validated by someone outside themselves who may know absolutely nothing about how this should or should not be done. While the input of others is important, don't ever let someone else talk you out of your goal or dream.

Questions and Answers

Asking questions can be the most powerful tool you have. Listening to answers can provide you the most powerful information you need.  Work to improve both the questions you ask and the patience to listen to the answers. Someone could be putting nuggets of gold before you.

If all you think about ...

If all you think about is the same ideas over and over, all you will get is the same outcomes over and over.  Dare to ask yourself, "What if ..." And when you do, listen to the answer.